What on earth next?
There has been a rush (5) of visitors to my door today seeking information on "Jose Mourinho haircut". I sincerely hope that they have been all tremendously disappointed as I can guarantee there is absolutely nothing there about the cheating (he's Portuguese isn't he?) bugger's greasy mane. I have had the television and wireless off most of the day so pardon me if I missed any breaking news.
posted by Richard at 11:49 pm
20 Vegetable peelings:
Hmmm.... Odd.
Who is this person?
Pamela, this is Richard. He is very nice. He lives with (and promises to make an honest person of) my 5th cousin once removed. Is there anything else I can tell you?
He's my wicket keeper.
Quick, she's coming round. Nurse, more morphine for the lady.
The headline in today's Mirror is:
JOSE LOSES HIS HAIR.. AND HIS MEMORY
You need never pick up a tabloid as you have me here to do it for you.
Jose 'Samson' Mourinho.
Or 'Kenny' for short.
Pamela - you don't want to know. He makes women weak at the knees...
Mark - who, Richard or Jose?
Is Jose Mourinho going bald or has he shaved his head? I've not seen the pictures, but he seems to cut his hair very short at the start of a season and he lets it grows longer towards the end of the season, as if part of some religious ritual.
Or perhaps he has got nits ...
Blogger won't let me put the permalink but click on the "Horror Hair" link below and look for the Horror Hair story if it's not still at the top of the page.
Horror Hair
Who's there?
Yes, I saw a picture of him in the Daily Express. He was also moaning that his players are all tired after the World Cup. I can think of four who've had a little more time to recover than Makalele and Gallas. Stop whingeing, you make Alex Ferguson look an amateur.
He's not so bloody handsome now is he? He is actually a bit of a git too. I'm not sure I'd go as far as playing the portuguese/cheat card though - but the whingeing - do you know, if I was a Chelsea supporter I'd have jumped ship after last season's performance.
I have corrected the hitherto unseen (and unseemly) spelling mistake. I dare say there are others but none as appalling as that one. Thank you Tom.
Tom - don't be silly. True supporters NEVER jump ship. If it had been all about attitude I'd have switched to Barcelona years ago. But Chelsea is my team I'm stuck with them through thick and thin keep right on to the end of the road even the bad times are good etc. Besides, they're currently WINNING, so your point about last season's performance was what exactly?
I doubt I'd like Mourinho if I met him face to face, and he has started wingeing a bit lately, but then they all do it given the chance and being likeable isn't really in the football manager's job description, is it?
That bloke at Liverpool (sorry, forgot his name) seems pleasant enough though I'm not sure I'd want to take a pint with him. David O'Leary beats Mourinho into a cocked hat when it comes to whingeing and complaining. Big Sam's all bluff and gruff and northern and 1950s. Arsene Whiner sorry Wenger has done so much whingeing his nose turned red. And Alex Ferguson is of course the Caledonian Antichrist and appears to be a thoroughly nasty person (I'm sure he's kind to his nearest and dearest though).
I think I'd quite like Martin Jol. But you never can tell.
Mark, I knew you'd read this and have to disagree. Fair do's, jumping ship is not an option for you, I can understand that. Agree about Jol - he seems a jolly decent chap. I like Psycho too. Benitez is an ok bloke as well. Can't think of any others in the premiership, oh yeh, Steve Coppell, he's a good egg isn't he?
Yes Vicus, there is a lot more you can tell me.
I'll need your bank account numbers and your celll phone number as well. Oh, and the codes and passwords you have for every thing.
I thought it would bring you out. Tell you the truth Ossie, I couldn't name you half the United side from last year. Players should be forced to stay with a club for 5 years minimum, unless retiring, like it or lump it. Maybe then the sides would start to show some kind of identity, the way they used to have instead of players just going to where the money was best and creating these dreadful homogenised teams. You can't say that money buys loyalty, the whole transfer system stinks rotten.
And yes, Zola was a class act, I agree. I did like Cantona's arrogance though and say what you like, he's a loyal red.
Why the obsession with men who play with balls, guys? I'm sure Freud would have had something interesting to say about this.
He'd probably just blame our parents.
Ossie, yes, your presence was a notable highlight of this thread and your Chelsea radar is obviously working well but it wasn't the prime reason for posting. I really didn't realise yer man had had tonsorial surgery of the most abrupt kind. When are you going to write a blog? C'mon...c'mon!
Ossie - couldn't agree more about Zola but please let's get a grip here.
All together now:
IT'S ONLY A GAME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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