So as we're not overly used to strangers round here, I've asked some of my dearest friends to help out with the arrangements. Vicus, ask them if they would like some organic tea and Abernethy biscuits, if you would be so kind (but do keep an eye on the silverware, especially the sugar tongs). Dave, the Australians are often fine and pioneering doctors; you could engage them in some conversation regarding genito-urinary problems. Mark, you can take some souvenir snaps for them to take back and play them this to make them feel at home. Dyna can mix some cocktails (for the guests to drink, mind). I'm afraid I don't have any "tinnies" in my "eskie" but I could send Jed out on the moped for "a slab" from Bargain Booze. I'm not overly familiar with Australian "beer", do you think Harp Lager will do? I'm also sorry to inform you that I have run out of lavatory paper in the guest cloakroom but my newsagent, Mr Murdoch, himself an emigré from down under, has kindly let me have several copies of The Times for a bargain price as a stop gap. He says it's already full of crap but he said he's made his fortune from selling similar to people who don't need it. I apologise for the picture of Ricky Ponting on the back of the cloakroom door, I've found it can be helpful if you've been overdoing the eggs.
Anyway, enjoy your stay, do come again.