Tuesday, January 02, 2007


It's a new year and it's my intention to turn over a new leaf. Needs must, as my mother says. Needs must indeed. Except it's not the devil driving, it's penury. Tomorrow I return temporarily to the ranks of the salaried. I will be listing toys on an internet auction site based in an old mushroom farm in Bilting. It doesn't pay much but it's small, friendly and will keep a pack of wolves from the door for a while until the cartloads of money start rolling in from my literary endeavours and I can afford an over-and-under Purdey to shoot the buggers with. I also need to save a few quid because I'm off to here for a few days at the end of month with this one. Lovely old habits die hard, especially if you don't let them. At the very least it will make me wonder why on earth I used to push my old die-cast models off the kitchen table and not keep them in their boxes in the loft. Actually, I can answer that. Because those things taught me how not to get bored. One had to think to play and there's precious little of that involved in a shoot 'em up.

It's been a while since I worked in anything approaching an office. Well, I did work for the Rural Payments Agency in Crewe for a few months but one doesn't like to admit it. It could be mildly amusing but nothing like this. Wish me luck.

15 Vegetable peelings:

Blogger Vicus Scurra said...

Good luck.

10:12 pm  
Blogger Vicus Scurra said...

That was really fucking pathetic, wasn't it?

10:12 pm  
Blogger Vicus Scurra said...

But it probably matched your expectations.

10:13 pm  
Anonymous Richard said...

No, not at all. It shows you have a caring, sharing side which will surprise many. I'm glad I was sitting down.

10:28 pm  
Anonymous Sharon J said...

Lykke Til :)

11:19 am  
Blogger Dyna Girl said...

Go Richard, Go Richard! Go Ri-Ri-Ri-Ri Richard!

7:50 pm  
Anonymous Richard said...

Go where? I can't go anywhere at the moment until I bum a tenner off dad for some petrol.

7:53 pm  
Blogger Murph said...

At this mushroom farm they will probably keep you in the dark and manure. Much like most salaried employment then.

6:02 pm  
Blogger Cherrypie said...

That's not a mushroom farm. It's Telly Tubby land if those pictures are anything to go by.

How much for a genuine Girls World complete with original make-up circa 1978?

8:03 pm  
Anonymous Richard said...

I couldn't say at the moment. I've been doing toy soldiers and now I'm onto James Bond cars. This is the wrong job for me, it's bad enough looking at all the collectible stuff, I haven't started on the real toys yet. It's like nostalgia central in there.

8:22 pm  
Blogger Sharon J said...

I remember desperately wanting a Barbie when I was little and then getting a Cindy doll instead from a shop down Walthamstow Market. It didn't matter - I was happy just to have a skinny doll. Let me know if you do vintage skinny dolls, won't you?

10:32 pm  

Hello there Richard - sorry I'm late. The plane from Ireland was held up for a while as anxious passengers insisted on watching Celebrity Big Brother before boarding. Widespread self-loathing caused further delays. Not a word of a lie.

None of this will make sense to you - or to anyone, I suppose - unless you have read the response I gave you on my blog. Hmm. Now I feel like I'm trawling for readers - quick, go and read the comments section in my blog. That sort of thing. God, blogging is a cruel business. So, to avoid this charge which, to be fair, only I seem to be levelling at myself, here is the answer I gave over there:

"......Are you the guy who wants to get the name of Cork International Airport changed in honour of Rory Gallagher?

Don't answer that. I know I'm right. I must admit I had never heard of Rory Gallagher until a few short months ago (I'm Scottish and only came over for the City of Culture 2005 thing and haven't quite got home yet).

Triskel Art Centre did a big thing on him not so long ago - and my girlfriend (an artist) has connections with that place. The general manager (Ben) is a friend of hers. He is a massive fan of Gallagher and was, as far as I am aware, the driving force behind the retrospectve.

I tell you what - I'm going to shut up for once. I'll come round to your blog and we can carry on there. No, please, don't mention it. I will be putting in a claim for mileage, however. Wear and tear and all that. I should be with you in England later this evening. Around 8 - 9pm, say.

Nice to meet you, Richard. I'll get packing....."

It seems fair to say, Richard, that it still might not make any sense to anyone - not even me. But there you go. Are you the airport guy, by the way? I hope so, because I like that sort of thing.

And were you aware of the Triskel thing? Eek. You may have even gone to it. In which case, and this is a VERY long shot, do you happen to know Ben Cuddihy (general manager of Triskel)? And if you do know him, and it transpires that we have moved in some eerily similar circles, I hope you don't mind me asking whether you were the guy who slept with my girlfriend. Was that you, Richard?

I hope so, because I like that sort of thing.

Good luck (you asked your readers to wish you it, and I'm happy to comply) on the work front and also, more importantly to my mind, on the Sharon J front. I'm trying to piece together your shared history from your respective blogs but can't help myself feeling that it's the future that counts.

Kind regards and greetings from County Cork,


PS. Hello to you too, Sharon.

2:36 am  
Anonymous Richard said...

Yes, I am that guy; no I've never been to Cork actually. It's an anomaly I hope to right one day but it means I've never slept with your girlfriend. Correcting that particular anomaly wouldn't be the right reason for visiting, though. And yes, Sharon and I do have a shared history and hopefully a shared future. Slight hiatus of sorts but only in the physical sense of being 250 miles apart. Glad you have arrived.

2:50 am  
Blogger Pamela said...

Richard, a job? I thought we writers were supposed to suffer and starve for our....uh...stuff.

Don't tell my husband, he'll be thinking that I need to go find a paycheck as well.

Best of luck with the trip and the rekindling of the romance.

6:50 am  
Blogger tom909 said...

Do you know Richard, I have never really had a job but just very occasionally I do think how nice it would be to sit somewhere doing some crap thing with no responsibility and get paid enough to live on for doing it.
Now cataloguing toys, mmmm not so sure, I quite fancy petrol station attendant or supermarket shelf stacker myself.

1:32 pm  

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