Sunday, December 30, 2007

That's Sir to you...

Today is my 74th birthday. This makes me older than my mother. Happy birthday to me.

I haven't been able to say anything until now but I was lucky enough to be rewarded in the New Year's Honours List. I am now KGOQSC (Knight Grand Order Queen's Shower Curtain). This little-known but relatively modern order dates back to Ramsay MacDonald's first audience with George V in 1923 when the first Labour Prime Minister inadvertently took a wrong turn into a public washroom believing it to be an ante-room to the royal apartments. Having been insufficiently briefed on the correct protocol, the premier waited for 15 minutes believing His Majesty to be the other side of a drawn gilded curtain. The word "Golden" was removed from the honour in 1983 after the Duke of Edinburgh made an inappropriate comment during an award ceremony in 1982. It is awarded in recognition of a lifetime spent waiting for something to happen without complaint. I shall bear the honour with pride.

I was given a fiendishly difficult puzzle by my sister. On the side of the box is the following legend:

Work it out.


Nobody worked it out. How can there be any incorrect solutions, let alone 250,000 (or even 250.000). Surely any solution to a puzzle is, by definition, correct.

10 Vegetable peelings:

Blogger ziggi said...

of course I'm sure you've already worked out all 48 ways to do it!

6:31 pm  
Blogger Richard said...

Cheating? I'll go to the foot of our stairs! No, no, no! These pages do not encourage Spanish practises.

I'm sure Dave and Vicus will see it immediately.

9:50 pm  
Blogger Dave said...

A long overdue award. It should be given to every wicket keeper who has faced my bowling.

7:31 am  
Blogger Murph said...

I'm still devastated that Brucie hasn't got his knighthood, so you've done OK Richard.

4:19 pm  
Blogger Pamela said...

Happy New year Richard! And congratulations on your award/title.

Does this mean you get to skip the security at airports and go right on through?

7:38 pm  
Blogger Dyna Girl said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!! You are awesome times a million.

3:23 am  
Blogger Malc said...

Who said the honours system had outlived its usefulness?

I'm rubbish at puzzles, but that box reminds me of something I once got from Ikea.

7:47 am  
Blogger Tennessee Jed said...

I would love to see the transcript of the golden shower curtain speech!

10:28 am  
Blogger Gorilla Bananas said...

The solution is: "A monkey's balls".

10:15 am  
Blogger Cherrypie said...

I love puzzles. That would keep me happy for days. Just remember to bring me occasional cups of tea and some biscuits. Wet wipes would be good too.



2:49 pm  

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