Gipsy tart makes you fart

I am not unnaturally quite perturbed by this. I fear the mentalists in Flintshire, not a million miles away from here, have very very little to do. Boys will be boys, and so will men. I think I will apply for a job with them but I will make it quite clear that if they don't employ me, I will assume it will be on the grounds that my name will cause general ribaldry to the point of distraction. Nonetheless, I have had 40 odd years of being used to it and nobody has come up with anything remotely original for at least 20 years (I actually quite liked Mr Seeds - everyone in a cricket team has a nickname) so I think litigation would be justified. What makes me laugh more than anything is the quite parochial nature of the complaint: renaming it "Spotted Richard" is quite laughable to anyone with a passing knowledge of rhyming slang.*

On a similar note, here in Cheshire garages and car dealerships with high values of customer service/satisfaction etc (ie doing what you'd expect them to do) are awarded the "Golden Spanner". Quite. Employ the services of the excellent Peevish.co.uk to understand why I won't be using them.

*If you really don't know, Richard the Thirds. Work it out.