Do you really care?

On Friday it is that bi-annual glad-fest that is Red-Nose day. Thankfully, and as is well known among you, my dear readers, I do not have a television so have been spared whatever has passed for publicity. I suspect it probably featured Dawn French being fat and Jonathon Ross being faintly rude. There hasn't been much on the wireless about it, which is good.

Don't misunderstand me, I'm not against giving money to charidee. I would if I could. However as I am at the moment totally funded by the government it seems rather stupid that I should pass on the money they've given me to charities when it is meant to be for my benefit and my benefit only. I have to declare any money I earn or am given otherwise I incur the wrath of civil servants (that they are an incompetent bunch of tossers is neither here nor there - they only managed to pay me the pittance deemed sufficient to live on a week late this week. A fact I only realised when I came to pay a bill and found I didn't have enough money) and I have been down that road and received an official caution for it. It stands to reason that I really therefore ought to declare what money I don't intend to spend on my own welfare. This wouldn't really be a problem for me as I tend not to waste it on Special Brew and recreational narcotics as I'm sure some claimants do. Although if the government was really that interested in providing efficient overseas aid, as it has indicated it is, a small hand-out to every man-jack in the country to spend on hungry childrens with the Aids in the third world would be the most efficient way of doing it. Government to government Overseas Aid doubtless goes straight into the bank accounts of wannabe Mugabes and other shits and bullies with guns. Very little is eventually spent on the deserving. Money via the aid agencies is spent more wisely. It's a no brainer, really it is.

That isn't my point though. What I find faintly galling about telethons and such is that I suspect many in this country use them to assuage their own guilt about how crap they are at really caring. Look at me I'm great, I give to poor kids in Africa (but I'm going to put Mum in a home because I have to go out to work because who else is going to pay for the Sky box and the kids want a Wii and some new trainers and then there's the holiday in the Dominican Republic to pay for and...). Care by proxy. This country loves to think it's a caring one and glories in the glitz and showbiz back slappery that apparently proves it. Bollocks. Before you phone in your credit card number on Friday, think when the last time you looked in on your elderly neighbour was. Do you even know your neighbour's name? Would you really be up to caring for a relative or are you going to leave it for someone else to do? I have done it, as you all know. I don't think I was that good at it particularly as I did it largely because I loved the person I cared for and I am in awe of those who can selflessly care for strangers. However, I won't have piercings or tattoos because it would prevent me from being a blood donor for a year. I am now on the platelets panel so can donate every fortnight if need be (as soon as they can sort out the problem with my blood pressure*). Unfortunately I will be unavailable for work while I'm stuck on a machine for two hours - does anyone mind if I don't tell?


*If they prescribe me drugs to lower my blood pressure, I won't be able to afford them so the poor sods on the operating table will have to go without. Because I am on contributions based Job Seeker's Allowance, I still have to pay £7.20 for each prescription item. Out of £60 a week. Is this a dastardly plot to kill off the unemployed?